Already Really Good Friends
by Caskett1960
Summary: Season 5 between the episodes 'After the Storm' and Still.' Rick and Kate learn how to become a couple as their families and friends gradually learn of their new relationship. Rated M because we are talking about a new couple here. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1--I'm Not Ready to Share You, Y

**Disclaimers: Nope, not mine.**

**Title: Already Really Good Friends**

**Summary: Follows the events between 'After the Storm' and 'Murder, He Wrote.' Kate and Castle learn how to become a couple as all of their friends eventually find out about their relationship. Rated M because, well, they are a new couple. **

**A/N #1: I'm now on Twitter. My username is Caskett1960. Please follow me. **

**A/N #2: The title for this story comes from a line in one of my favorite movies. At the end of 'Tootsie,' Dustin Hoffman tells Jessica Lange that becoming a couple should be easy, since they're already really good friends. **

Chapter 1: I'm Not Ready to Share You, Yet

"_I have to serve out my suspension, the same as Esposito," Kate told Castle as the two of them entered the elevator at the 12__th__ precinct._

"_So, what are you gonna do in the meantime?"_

"_Oh, I'm sure I'll think of something," Kate grabbed his crotch, causing him to suck in his breath._

It was after midnight when Kate Beckett and Richard Castle walked through the door to her apartment. Castle couldn't believe that it had only been a couple of hours since he'd awakened to find Kate gone. He'd known instantly where she was going and knew that he had to stop her before she did something to irrevocably ruin her life.

"So, what happened?" He asked after she'd closed and locked the door.

"I confronted him," she answered simply. "Well, at first, I had my gun on him and I thought about shooting him. Leaving him to die like he ordered Coonan to leave my mother. But then I realized that if I did that, it didn't make me any better than him. So, I punched him in the face instead."

"Did it make you feel any better?"

"No, not really," she admitted.

"I was terrified when I woke up and you were gone. Kate, you took an awful risk confronting him like you did."

"I wanted him to know that I'm around, Castle. I'm around and now I've got the upper hand."

"So, what did Gates say besides telling you that you have to serve out your suspension?" He asked, changing the subject.

"Nothing much. She said that she appreciates our loyalty to Roy. She said that she hopes that someday we'll show her the same loyalty."

"Is she going to open an investigation?" He asked, fearing what tarnishing the late captain's memory could do to Evelyn Montgomery and their children.

"No," she shook her head. "I think she knows that if she were to do that, she'd find out more than she wants to know at this point. I just wonder when it's all going to end."

"You're going to get him, Kate," he walked over and enfolded her into his arms, feeling her settle against his chest as he held her. "I don't know how and I don't know when, but it's going to happen."

"Do you remember when I told you that I'd never be safe?" She reminded him of her words after Mr. Smith had mysteriously died. "Well, right now, I feel perfectly safe with you."

"I'll do my best to make sure that you keep feeling safe."

She pulled away from him with a slight smile playing on her lips. A smile that he couldn't help returning. "In the meantime, I do have a suspension to serve. You did tell me a couple of days ago that you also have some days off."

"Well, I have to get some writing done eventually, but since I'm not shadowing my favorite detective, I do have a fair amount of free time," he bent down and gently kissed her.

"We can spend that time getting to know each other a little better," she slowly unbuttoned his shirt.

"Kate, we've known each other for five years," he reminded her. "I think that we know just about everything there is to know about each other."

"Not what I'm talking about, Castle. You see, it's like this," she bit down on her lower lip seductively. "In two days of sleeping together, I've noticed that you sleep in boxers. I've noticed that you like it when I reach down and very lightly touch you," she unzipped his jeans and demonstrated, feeling him instantly get harder in her hand.

"I think getting to know each other better is an excellent idea," he fought to breathe as she continued her light touch on him.

Early morning sunlight was streaming through Kate's bedroom window when Castle opened his eyes the next morning, looking at his partner soundly sleeping beside him. Sometime during the night she'd gotten up and dressed in a pair of shorts and a long-sleeved shirt. He couldn't help but notice that she slept on top of the covers, her long legs bare to his admiring gaze. He propped himself on one elbow while he continued watching her. As if sensing that she was being observed, she rolled over and sleepily smiled at him. "Hey, Castle," she breathed as his mouth came down on hers for a long, tender kiss. "Are you watching me sleep? Because if you are, it's a little creepy."

"Why'd you get dressed?" He asked, ignoring her comment about him watching her sleep. To her it was creepy; to him it was a favorite pastime.

"I don't like to sleep naked," she told him. "I mean, if there's a fire or a knife-wielding maniac in my bedroom, I have to be dressed."

"So, you never sleep au natural?"

"On occasion, but usually, no," she smiled.

"I think I'm going to take a shower. Care to join me?"

"You obviously haven't seen the size of my shower," she made a face. "I think I'm going to take a long bubble bath instead."

"Would you like some company or are baths a solitary thing?"

"You want to take a bath with me?" She was amused. This was a first. None of the other men she'd been with would even consider such a thing.

"Is this a problem?" 

"No," she smiled. "Come on."

Kate's tub wasn't as large as the one in his bathroom at the loft, but they made it work. He sat at one end of the tub while she sat at the other end. "So, what do you want to do today?" He asked, settling her legs over his as she lay back in the hot water.

"I don't know. We could spend more time getting to know each other," she grinned at him.

"I knew it! I knew all of this time that you were just after my body!"

"Yeah, right. Dream on, Castle. Who was always checking out whose ass?"

"Hey, I saw you checking me out on multiple occasions," he told her.

"Name one," she challenged him.

"When Cujo ripped my pants! My ass was hanging out, but I noticed you checking me out."

"I couldn't help it! Your pants were half torn off of you. Where else was I supposed to look?"

"Oh, I don't know. The ceiling, the floor, anywhere but at my ass!"

"I have to admit that I enjoyed the view," she bit down on her lip, causing the blood to head to his groin.

He moved toward the middle of the tub and pulled her closer to him, groaning when he felt her wrap her long legs around his waist. "You did, did you?" He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tighter against him. "So, has the unclothed version of my ass lived up to your expectations?"

"The unclothed version of _everything _has lived up to my expectations," she nibbled on his bottom lip, forcing his mouth open, swallowing his groan when she darted her tongue inside to taste him. "I still can't believe that we're here, like this," she rested her forehead against his when they came up for air.

He didn't say anything as his fingers traced the healing bruises on her arms and ribs, the result of a near fatal fall from a rooftop just days before. The day that had changed both of their lives. "Kate, what happens when everybody finds out?" He had to ask.

"I don't know. The only thing that I know for sure is that Gates can never know. If she finds out—"

"I know. What I'm asking is do you think that we can maintain two different relationships? A working relationship and what we have here, with us?"

"We have to, because I'm not ready to share you, Rick. Not with anybody."

"Same here," he gave her that irresistible grin that she could never help but return. She tightened her arms around his waist before kissing him again.

She sighed when his lips traveled down to her neck. Every time his lips touched her neck, it took her back to that first night when she'd been pinned against his wall as his lips had blazed a trail down her body. She could feel his arousal pressed between them, begging her to touch him. He groaned loudly at the feeling of her hand wrapped around him. "Let's get out of here," she pulled away and looked at him, desire burning bright in her eyes.

After getting out of the tub and drying each other off, she took his hand and led him back into her bedroom. Pushing him down on the edge of the bed, she sank to her knees in front of him, continuing what she'd started in the tub. He closed his eyes at the feeling of being in her mouth. He thought that he was going to explode when he felt her humming around his hardness. After several minutes, she released him from her mouth and pushed him over so that he was flat on his back before climbing up on the bed beside him. "You're good," he told her, smiling as she blushed and bit her lower lip.

"I know," she kissed him. "But, if memory serves me from . . . I think it was round number two on our first night together, so are you."

He couldn't wipe the huge grin from his face as he wrapped his arms around her and rolled her so that he was looking down into those gorgeous green eyes. Capturing her mouth with his own, his hand reached down to caress her breasts, feeling her nipples harden under his palm. She whimpered in disappointment when he left her mouth, but that disappointment faded to joy when she felt him close his mouth over her breast. His other hand kept up his teasing of her other breast before he switched sides. She twined her fingers into his hair, massaging his scalp as he continued his slow assault on her senses. Usually Kate liked things a little faster, but she decided that this slow build-up was very nice. Very nice indeed. It was like savoring a wonderful meal. Why rush things?

She felt him lightly stroking the long scar below her ribs and flinched slightly. "Are you okay?" She heard Castle ask.

"Yeah, it just feels strange having you touch it," she admitted.

He traced the puckered line of flesh with his tongue, feeling her quiver beneath him before he made his way further down. He could feel her stomach clench in anticipation of where he was heading. But he decided to keep her anticipating for just a little bit longer. He moved down to the end of the bed and lightly kissed the backs of both of her knees before gliding up to kiss her inner thighs. Finally he opened her legs for his questing fingers, lips and tongue. He reveled in the taste of her and in the sounds that she was making as he caressed her with his mouth.

Kate had had oral sex hundreds of times, but she'd never had anyone who spent as much time pleasuring her as Castle did. He took his time truly worshipping every single inch of her. She cried out when she felt him enter her, first with his tongue and then with two fingers, curling them up and pressing into her as she came with a scream that she didn't recognize as coming from her throat. Her last coherent thought was of being glad they'd stayed the night here instead of at the loft where his mother and daughter would hear everything that they were doing. She continued crying out at the feel of Castle's tongue still gently flicking at her swollen nub. The sensitivity was starting to become unbearable. "Castle," she groaned. "Stop. Please? I can't take any more."

He made his way back up her body, pulling her close and kissing her as she reached down to touch him once again, loving the pulsating feel of him in her hand. She swung one leg over his hip as she reached down to guide him into her, gasping at the feeling of him filling her still extremely sensitive core. He pulled her tighter into his arms as they began to rock slowly together, gradually moving faster, nearing their peak. She clamped her mouth down on him, kissing him hungrily as she rolled him onto his back without breaking their connection, moving faster astride him before taking his hands and guiding them up to her breasts, crying out at the feel of him tweaking her nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

"Kate," he growled out her name, feeling his climax hurtling into him. He moved his hands from her breasts down to her hips, guiding her while he thrust up into her. "Kate, are you close?"

"Almost . . . there," she panted, grabbing one of his hands and placing it between her legs. "Touch me, Castle. Hard," she panted again, feeling his fingers began to rub that most sensitive part of her body. "No, Castle! Harder!"

He followed her instructions, immediately feeling her tighten up around him almost painfully, which pushed him over the edge. She put her hand over his, guiding it as she threw her head back and continued crying out. After several minutes, she felt herself finally beginning to come back down to earth. She was still breathing hard when she felt Castle smiling up at her. Biting her lip again, she leaned down and kissed him, feeling his arms coming around her as she felt him slip out of her. She cuddled into his chest, feeling him throw her comforter over the both of them. She fell asleep just like that, on his chest with his arms tightly wrapped around her, feeling cocooned and safe.

When she awoke a couple of hours later, she felt slightly sore but very relaxed. "This is nice," she heard Castle whisper, his fingers lightly stroking her back. "But I need coffee."

"Me, too," she agreed, swinging her leg over his hips and sliding off of the bed. She pulled her clothes back on before padding barefoot out to the front of the apartment.

She had just finished pouring coffee for the both of them when Castle came out of her bedroom, his feet also bare and his shirt unbuttoned. "Thank you," he smiled when she handed him a cup of coffee. "So, what're you thinking about? I can almost see the wheels turning."

"Castle, do you remember what we talked about the morning after—?" She looked across the counter at him as he nodded. "When we both said that we're onboard with this. With you and me," she pointed between the two of them. "Do you really think that we can work?"

"Yes, I think that we can work," he got up and came around the counter, taking her cup and placing it on the counter before wrapping his arms around her. "It's not going to be easy. Nothing worth having ever is. But Kate, we've done the hard part."

"The hard part?" She loved looking at him. She didn't know why it'd taken her so long to realize just how much she enjoyed looking at him.

"Yeah. We're already really good friends, so now we can become a really amazing couple," he gave her his trademark Castle grin.

"Amazing, huh?" She reached up and draped her arms loosely around his neck. "I like amazing."

**A/N #3: This story is only going to be three, maybe four chapters. Much shorter than my last story. Please read and review. **

**A/N #4: The boyfriend and my worst critic complains that Kate Beckett bites her lower lip easily as often as Anastasia does in '50 Shades of Gray.' Hmmm, I'd never noticed that before. Thanks Chuck for pointing that out.**


	2. Chapter 2--Growing Pains

**Disclaimers: If only.**

**Summary: The cat begins to slip out of the bag as Kate and Castle's relationship starts to come to light.**

**A/N #1: I'm so looking forward to Sept. 23. But until then I'm trying to re-watch Season 5 episodes on ABC as well as online to catch up on little things that I missed the first time around. But the Season 6 promo is now up on YouTube. **

**A/N #2: This chapter takes place around the time of 'Cloudy with a Chance of Murder' and 'Secret's Safe with Me.' **

**A/N #3: Someone asked me if I could write smut for every chapter. I don't know, but you guys who do are heroes in my book. **

**A/N #4: Thanks to the person who pointed out that I had my math wrong in Chapter 1. Rick and Kate had actually known each other for about four years, not five. Sorry for the error.**

Chapter 2: Growing Pains

"_Are you going to have the talk with Alexis?" Martha asked her son._

"_The sex talk? Mother, I had that talk with her ages ago. And I learned so much," he said in a dreamy voice._

"_Not the sex talk, Richard. The Beckett talk. Are you going to tell her about you and Beckett?"_

"_Mother, how long-?"_

"_Richard, please?" Martha scoffed. "I've known since I came back from the Hamptons and you had her hiding in your closet."_

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Alexis asked her father, after she'd come back into the living room and settled onto the sofa.

"Sweetie, I wanted to talk to you about me and Beckett," he looked at his daughter, wondering where the time had gone. It seemed like just yesterday he was holding a redheaded newborn in his arms and now she was getting ready to move into a dorm room at Columbia.

"What about you and Beckett?"

Castle took a deep breath before facing his daughter. "Kate . . . Beckett and I have been seeing each other for a little while."

"Define 'a little while,'" Alexis stared at him with huge blue eyes.

"Since the night of your graduation," he confessed.

"Since the night . . . dad, that was three months ago! You've been 'seeing' each other all summer and you're just now telling me?"

"Alexis, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you because it's important that Beckett's co-workers don't find out about us. If Capt. Gates were to find out, we wouldn't be able to work together—"

"Dad, have you ever known me to go around spreading gossip? I'm more capable of keeping a secret than you think I am. I'm not a child, dad! All you had to do was be straight with me," she got up and stormed upstairs to her room.

"Well, that went well," he said to himself, rubbing a hand over his face.

The next morning Kate was working on paperwork at her desk when Castle walked over and sat down in his chair, silently handing her a cup of coffee. "Thanks," she took the cup and took a huge gulp of it. "What's wrong? You look like someone just shot your puppy."

"Can we talk?" He looked at her as she nodded and walked toward the supply closet with him right behind her. He waited until she'd closed the door behind them. "I told Alexis about us."

"You did what? Castle, I thought that we agreed to wait," she hissed at him.

"We have waited," he glared at her. "Kate, we've been together for three months. By the way, my mother already knew. Supposedly she guessed it the morning that she came back early from the Hamptons. She knew that you were hiding in my closet."

"I can't imagine how," she rolled her eyes. "I mean, you were acting perfectly normal. Oh, wait. I forgot. You and normal aren't compatible in the same sentence. Oh, I know!" She snapped her fingers. "Maybe she saw you shoving _my_ bra under _your_ bed with your foot!"

"Why are you so mad?"

"I'm not mad. But, if Alexis knows, before you know it, she'll say something to Lanie, who will say something to Espo during a booty call. And once he knows, well, he can't keep his mouth shut to save his soul. And then Gates finds out, and she calls the Chief of D's and I get charged with an ethics violation. Great!"

"Kate, Alexis is _not _going to say anything. She understands what's at stake. She is, however, a little pissed off that I kept this from her all summer."

"It's not like she hasn't been pissed off at you before. I seem to remember her coming down here a time or two and tearing you a new one."

"No, Kate. This time she's _really _pissed. As in, getting up this morning and not talking to me pissed. Look, we can talk about this more later. I have some other stuff that I need to talk to you about, but it'll keep."

"So, are you coming to my place tonight?" She smiled at him.

"I look forward to it," he smiled back at her.

Later that evening, Kate cooked them dinner and then they settled on her sofa with glasses of wine. "So, what other stuff did you need to talk to me about?" She asked him, smiling at his puzzled expression. "This morning, you said that there was other stuff that you needed to talk to me about."

"Oh," he put his glass down on the coffee table. "When you got shot and I didn't hear from you, I stopped going to the precinct."

"I know. I remember."

"I was angry, Kate, and Alexis picked up on a lot of the anger and hurt that I was feeling. When Smith started calling me, I told my mother about it. Alexis overheard us talking about how he wanted me to steer you away or the people who'd killed your mom were going to come after you. That was the first time she told me how much seeing you get shot had scared her."

"Oh, Castle," Kate breathed.

"She told me that I could've gotten shot or even her. She told me that I needed to grow up and stop pretending that I was something that I wasn't. I think she's angry because she saw how hurt I was."

"Castle, I'm so sorry," she took his hand and squeezed it. "I'll be more than happy to talk to her if you want me to. But, she needs to understand something, too. I know that she's your number one priority, but don't you deserve to be happy, too?"

"She wants me to be happy, Kate. I guess she just feels like I hid this from her intentionally."

"It wasn't intentional. We just wanted to get used to being a couple before we announced it to the world. But, if your mother's known almost since the beginning, I think I'd better tell my dad about us."

"What're you going to do about the boys and Lanie?"

"I can't tell any of them yet, Castle. It's too risky. If I tell any of them, then it becomes a giant game of telephone and Gate will find out. I don't want us being split up," she smiled.

"Me, either," he gave her a sad smile. "So, do you want me to stay?"

"Do you want to stay?"

"Always."

Kate lay awake long after Castle had gone to sleep that night. She thought about what he'd told her about Alexis. Kate could understand some of what she was feeling. She'd had her father to herself for the majority of her life, except for the brief period when he was married to Gina, and Alexis had been just a little girl at the time. Kate could also understand how what she had done that summer could affect the both of them. But, as Dr. Burke had told her, she'd been healing. She hadn't been ready to accept Castle's undying declaration of love for her. She still wasn't at the point where she was ready to say those three words back to him. She wasn't sure when she would be.

She picked up her cell and looked at the clock, wondering if Castle's daughter would still be awake. She crept out of bed and walked into the living room, scrolling through her contacts until she found her number and hit 'dial.' "Hello?" Alexis' voice sounded wary as she answered the phone.

"Alexis, it's Kate Beckett," Kate kept her voice low, glancing toward her bedroom. "I was wondering if we could get together and have lunch in the next couple of days."

"If this is about you and my dad not telling me anything for _three _months, I'm not sure there's anything that I want to hear."

"Alexis, please," Kate begged. "I know that you're angry and I know that you're hurt. Can we please talk about this?"

"Okay," the younger woman finally relented. "I'll meet you at Remy's tomorrow at noon."

"Thank you, Alexis."

Kate sighed as she ended the call and went back to get in bed beside Castle, who stirred slightly but didn't wake up when she got back into bed next to him. Curling into his body, she closed her eyes and fell asleep.

The next afternoon, Alexis was already waiting for Kate when the detective entered their favorite hamburger joint. "Thank you for meeting me," Kate said, sitting down across from the redhead.

"How did you manage to get away from my dad?"

"Ryan and Espo took him with them to pick up a suspect. Your dad and I talked for a long time last night. He told me how scared you were when I got shot. Alexis, I'm so sorry."

"It could've been my dad, it could've been anybody else at that funeral," Alexis blinked back sudden tears. "And then when Josh blamed him—"

"I'm so sorry about that. He had no right to do that."

"My dad was a wreck that summer; Det. Beckett. He had awful nightmares where he'd scream out for you not to leave him. Then when he didn't hear from you, he was so angry. When he came home and told me and gram that he'd seen you at his book signing, I got worried. I knew that you were going to want to know who shot you and I didn't blame you," she added quickly, "but I didn't want my dad getting sucked back into it."

"Alexis, I care for your father a great deal. We never meant for you to think that we were hiding our relationship from you, because that was never our intention. It's just that crossing this line makes things very complicated for me at work. I enjoy working with Castle. If my captain was to find out that we're romantically involved, she'll kick him out of the precinct. It's against department regulations for me to date someone that I work with."

"But, technically my dad isn't a cop," Alexis pointed out.

"I know, but Gates isn't going to look at technicalities. The only reason that we never said anything to you or to your grandmother is we're trying to figure this out for ourselves. We were friends for such a long time that plunging into this is a big step."

"I asked him once if you make him happy," Alexis remembered.

"Yeah? What did he say?"

"He told me that yes, you make him happy. I was nine when my dad divorced Gina. I remember how upset he was. I don't want to see him hurt again."

"Alexis, I can't swear that I'll never hurt him, but I can promise you that I'll try not to. Now, I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

"Me, too," Alexis smiled for the first time since Kate had arrived.

"So, are you anxious about moving into your dorm room?" Kate asked after their food had arrived.

"A little, but my dad and gram keep reminding me that they're only 10 minutes away by car if I need them."

"It's hard to watch your only child leave home. When I left home to go to Stanford, it was the first time I ever saw my dad cry, although he tried very hard to hide it."

"Was that hard? Leaving to go to school across the country?"

"Not really. I spent a semester abroad when I was in high school, so it wasn't as rough as it was on some of my classmates. My roommate cried for weeks and her parents were only a state away. Are you sorry that you're going to school so close to home?"

"No, it doesn't feel right to be leaving home just yet. Like my counselor told me, I'll have plenty of time to do that later."

***CCC***

Kate knew that Castle was moving Alexis into her dorm room that weekend, so she decided to stop by the loft and visit with Martha for a little while. "So, how was Rick this morning?" Kate asked as Martha brought two cups of coffee over.

"I don't know who was crying more, Alexis or Richard," Martha remembered, sitting on the sofa beside her son's girlfriend. "So, how are you and my son getting along?"

"Things are going good," Kate bit her lip, trying to keep from blushing. "I'm having dinner with my dad tonight to break the news to him. I understand that you've known for a while."

"Katherine, I've walked in on my son enough times to know that something was definitely up. Besides, I saw you in the closet," the older woman smiled knowingly as Kate rolled her eyes and groaned. "Subtle, you two aren't."

"Thank you for not saying anything."

"Who was I going to tell? Page 6? Please?" Martha scoffed. "Richard does his best to keep his family out of those awful gossip rags. So, have you discussed the next step?"

"The next step? You mean marriage? No."

"Silly girl, marriage is no longer the logical next step. No, have you talked about moving in together?"

"No, I think we both like things just as they are for right now."

"I notice that he's been spending a lot of time at your place. You're more than welcome to stay here. I can make myself scarce."

"I'll keep that in mind," she smiled.

Later that evening, Kate made dinner for her father. They sat and talked about baseball, current events, his work, her work. "So, what's the occasion, Bug?" He called her by her familiar childhood nickname, which always caused her to smile.

"Who said that there has to be an occasion for me to cook for my father?" She teased, pouring him another glass of iced tea.

"How's Rick?" He asked.

"Rick's fine. He's the reason why I asked you over here tonight."

"So, how long have you been seeing him?"

"Is it that obvious?" She asked in shock.

"You look happy, Katie. Happier than I've seen you look in a very long time. I went to see him before you got shot."

"I know. He told me."

"I was scared for you. I was scared that your search for the truth would destroy you. I didn't want to lose you, too. I . . . we had both already lost too much. He's a good man, Katie. Do you love him?"

"I . . . I'm not quite at that point, yet. But, I care about him. Very much."

"That's good, because it's important that you like him first before you fall in love with him. But, the last time I saw your eyes sparkle like they are now was when your mother was still alive."

"Do you think that she'd like him?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "He's smart, he seems to be funny, and he wrote some of her favorite books. She'd probably be fighting you for his attention."

"Probably," Kate agreed. "She'd be asking me why I waited so long."

"She probably would. Katie, if he makes you as happy as I think he does, hold onto him. Hold onto him with both hands for dear life."

"I will."

Kate was curled up in a corner of her sofa reading later that evening when she heard a familiar rapping on her door. She smiled before she got up and opened the door to find Castle standing there, looking more than a little sad. "Hi," he said, walking past her into the living room. "I would've called or texted—"

"Its all right, Castle. Are you okay?"

"That was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, Kate. I felt like I was abandoning Alexis instead of moving her into a dorm room 10 minutes away from home."

"She's going to be fine. She knows that you're a phone call and a short car ride away if she needs you," she walked up to him and put her hands on his chest. "Its not easy letting your child move on."

He didn't say anything. He put his arms around Kate, pulling her to his chest and simply holding her. "So, how did dinner go with your dad?"

"Good," she pulled away and smiled. "He suspected that we were seeing each other."

"Wow, we're not fooling a lot of people, are we?"

"Well, for right now, we're fooling the ones that matter."

"Kate, come to the loft with me," he looked down at her. "I know that Alexis is okay, but I just need to feel her presence. To go up to her room and—"

"Its okay, Castle," she smiled, lightly kissing him. "Let me get a few things."

***CCC***

"_So, we'll talk tonight?" Kate asked._

"_I'm looking forward to it," he held out his hand, smiling as she placed her hand in his and he gently shook it before walking to the elevator, continuing to smile at her as the doors closed behind him._

She smiled while she finished her paperwork. Handshakes had definitely taken on a whole new meaning since she'd started sleeping with Castle. Since they had to maintain a semblance of a working relationship while at the precinct, they'd decided to use handshakes as an intimate form of communication. She knew she'd never see handshaking the same way ever again.

She opened her desk drawer to put her stapler away, smiling when she saw her little stick man sitting on top. She was glad that she'd told that story to Castle. He deserved to know what made her tick. She removed the figure from her desk and examined it. She thought back to her 19-year-old self, remembering how scared, overwhelmed, and bewildered she'd been those days after the funeral. That day at Coney Island was the last truly good memory she would share with her father for a very long time. It was shortly after that day that he started his downward spiral, turning into a bitter, drunken man who didn't even closely resemble the man that she knew today. She closed her eyes and shook her head, shaking those memories from her mind. They didn't deserve a place in her thoughts today. Today, she was going to finish up her paperwork, and head for Castle's loft, where he promised to cook her dinner for a change.

***CCC***

Rick was putting the final touches on dinner when he heard the door buzzer. He walked over and pulled the door opened, smiling brightly when he saw his dinner companion standing there. "Perfect timing," he opened the door for her. "Dinner will be ready in about 10 minutes. Would you like a glass of wine?" He asked, taking her coat from her.

"I'd love some wine," she returned his smile. He hung up her coat before going into the kitchen and pouring her a glass of wine. "Thank you," she took the glass from him. "Something smells wonderful."

"I hope that you like veal parmesan."

"Its one of my favorites," she smiled, sitting on one of the bar stools to watch him.

"Good."

Over dinner, they chatted about different topics. His book, the latest movies, music, their families. "I hope that you didn't think that story today was silly," she took a sip of her wine.

"Why would I think it was silly? Its part of you. A part of who you are."

"For a while, I'd feel guilty for being happy on what was such an awful day," she admitted.

"Do you think that your mother would've wanted you and your dad to wallow in your grief?" He asked her pointedly.

"No, she wouldn't. Its just . . . things got really bad with my dad right after that," she looked at him, sadness etched in her eyes.

"That's when he started drinking?"

"Yeah. I had to go back to school. I knew that something wasn't right because I'd call home and he sounded . . . off. It took me a little while to realize what was going on. By the time I was able to transfer to NYU a couple of months later, he'd already gotten really bad. I begged him repeatedly to get help, but I finally had to come to the realization that he wasn't going to get help until he was ready to admit that he had a problem. I guess stubbornness runs in the family," she smiled.

"What do you mean?"

"I saw Dr. Burke during that summer because I had to. I couldn't come back to the job until I'd passed my psych eval. I didn't think that I was spiraling out of control. I thought that I felt like I always did."

"Until you froze that day?" He looked at her as she nodded. "Kate, I didn't question your explanation. On one hand, what you said made perfect sense. You'd only been back a couple of days. I mean, I'd never been shot. I guess I would've reacted the same way if it had been me."

"Do you remember the night at my place when you touched my scar and I flinched?"

"Yeah."

"Before that night . . . that I showed up here, nobody except me and my doctors had ever seen my scars. Josh hadn't even seen them. I'd look at them in the mirror and I'd think about how hideous they look. I would think that no man was ever going to want to be with me."

"Kate—"

"No, its okay," she smiled. "I've gone through a lot of therapy to get to this point, Castle. That night when I took your hand and placed it on the scar on my chest, I wanted to share it with you. After all, you were there when it happened. This scar," she touched the dimpled area by her left breast, "doesn't bother me all that much. But, I hate the other scar. I wonder if I always will."

"Those scars are a part of you, Kate. A part of your history, just like the little stick man that you keep in your desk drawer at work. They're always going to serve as reminders of who you are and how far you've come on your journey to get to where you are now." She gave him a tremulous smile as he placed his hand over hers and squeezed it.

"Dinner was wonderful, Castle. Thank you."

He felt his heart swell as he continued holding her hand. He found it hard to believe that there were two such distinct sides to Kate Beckett's personality. At work, she was the bad ass detective who chased after killers in four inch heels and made grown men cry in interrogation. While here with him, she was his beautiful, often insecure girlfriend. He wondered if he was ever to going to solve this mystery that was Kate Beckett. He continued smiling as he got up from the table, pulling her out of her chair and toward his office. "I have something special planned for dessert," he led her through his office, into his bedroom and then into the en suite bath just beyond. "I'm going to run us a nice hot bath, and then I'm going to take you into that bedroom and make love to you."

"So, I'm dessert?" She couldn't help grinning at him.

"Well, when you put it that way, yes. Stay right there," he moved over to the tub and turned on the water, checking the temperature before he returned to her. His fingers began nimbly unbuttoning her blouse before he slipped it off of her shoulders. When she reached up to begin unbuttoning his shirt, he stopped her with a wagging finger. "I'm doing everything. I don't want you to do a thing."

"Really?" She looked at him with a wary expression.

"Kate, please let me do this. I _need _to do this."

She looked into his deep blue eyes and felt herself melting inside. Her inner voice was screaming at her, asking her if it was that damn difficult to relinquish control once in a while? She decided that it might even be nice to let Castle take over. After all, it wasn't like he sucked in bed because he definitely didn't. "Okay," she bit her lip and smiled at him while he finished undressing her before removing his own clothes. He then stepped into the tub and settled against the back of it before taking her hand and helping her in with him. She sat down and allowed him to pull her against his chest, as she sighed deeply. "This is nice, Castle."

"When I had this bathroom redecorated, I had this bathtub installed just for this purpose. I wanted to find someone to share nice long soaks with me," he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her even closer.

"I thought that you'd have it installed so that you could play with toy boats," she teased.

"I do have a submarine. I'll bring it in here sometime," he grinned.

"That's okay, Castle. I stopped playing with toys in the tub when I was six."

"All toys?" His fingers teased her breasts as she gasped.

"Really, Castle? That's almost as bad as asking me for my number. Anyway, I don't need toys. I have the real thing," she craned her head around so she could kiss him.

"You're supposed to be relaxing," he reminded her as his hands resumed their exploration of her breasts. After a few minutes, he squirted a liberal amount of body wash onto a bath sponge and began soaping Kate's body, paying special attention to all of the areas where she wanted it the most.

Kate couldn't help the moans, whimpers, and sighs that were escaping her mouth while Castle bathed her. Why had it taken so long to find out how sexy bathing with a partner could be? She bit down hard on her lower lip when his fingers slipped along her wet folds, stroking her slowly, languidly, as she felt the delicious tightening beginning in her belly, radiating downward toward her pelvis. "A little harder, Castle. I'm so close," she tried to put her hand over his to guide him, but he stopped her.

"Let it build up, Kate," he whispered in her ear while he continued softly stroking her, his thumb brushing against her clit on the up stroke.

The tension was almost painfully unbearable. She gripped the sides of the tub so hard that her knuckles turned white, feeling the tension building . . . building . . . building . . . a little more. She screamed as her orgasm burst through her in a blinding flash of white light. It seemed to go on and on as Castle kept slowly stroking her until finally she was too sensitive for him to continue. After she came down, he cradled her against him, planting soft kisses on her temple and jaw while she felt herself gradually relaxing against him. "Castle, your fingers . . . wow," was all she was able to say as she heard him chuckle against her back.

"Just think. I'm not done, yet," he whispered in her ear.

"You might have to carry me out of here. I'm not sure I can move."

"Move up a second," he instructed her. She moved up and then she felt him standing up from behind her and easing out of the tub. He then reached for her hand and helped her from the tub.

She felt dazed and incredibly relaxed when he grabbed a towel from a heated rack and began to slowly dry her off. "I love your bathroom, Castle. I love the heated towels."

"You like that, do you? It's very five-star hotel, don't you think?"

"Very," she agreed.

After he finished drying her, he quickly dried himself off before leading her into the bedroom where he turned down the bed and helped her in before getting in beside her. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her, his tongue lightly sweeping along her bottom lip as she opened her mouth to allow him entrance while his hand made a leisurely sweep down her body from neck to hip. After thoroughly exploring her mouth with his tongue, he moved down to suck at the pulse point on her neck, nibbling on it gently before moving to her throat and collarbone, his lips ghosting over her bare skin while she sighed.

Her senses felt wonderfully alive every time he made love to her. She felt Castle's fingers lightly touching the puckered round scar at her left breast before he pressed his lips to it. She considered the scars from her shooting as much Rick's as they were hers. After all, he'd tried to save her that awful day. That's why it was fitting that he should be the first and hopefully, only man who'd ever see them. "Yes," she whispered, carding her fingers into his hair when she felt him take her nipple between his lips, pulling it taut between his lips and teeth before moving to her other breast. While using his mouth on one breast, he kept one hand on her other breast, caressing and tugging on her swollen nipple as she writhed under him. She could feel the heat and the hardness of him against her thigh.

He groaned and stopped her hand when he felt her reaching for him. "Not yet," he whispered against her skin, his breath moist and hot on her.

She closed her eyes and gave in to the feeling of him expertly making love to her. It was fitting that a man who could write such wonderful sex scenes in his books should be a master of the craft in real life. She rubbed her thighs together, trying to ease the ache that was slowly building. She longed for him to touch her down there, to do _something _to ease the powerful longing that she was feeling. "Castle," her voice sounded needy, pleading, but that was how she was feeling at the moment.

He glanced up at her, noticed how her eyes were closed. He wanted to see her, to look into those passion darkened eyes as he loved her. "Kate," he whispered her name as her eyes opened and she looked down at him. "I want you to watch me."

Her heart began to pound a staccato rhythm in her chest as she kept her eyes on him, watching him slowly move down her body. He smiled up at her as he settled between her legs and put his mouth over her. She cried out and arched her back off of the bed at the feeling of his hot, wet mouth caressing her wetness. "Fuck, Castle," she clawed at the sheets as he alternated his touch on her, soft one minute and then a little harder a second later. It was mind blowing.

Castle draped Kate's legs over his shoulders, opening her up even more. She cried out louder when he hummed against her core, the vibrations turning her on even more. She clawed at his hair when he entered her with his tongue and then his fingers. He felt her clenching around his fingers as he angled them inside of her. "Let go, Kate. Come on, come for me."

"Fuck, Castle! I'm coming!" She screamed his name repeatedly as the spasms seemed to go on and on. She was still coming down from her orgasm when she felt Castle moving over her, and slowly filling her as she gasped at the feeling of fullness. She was so swollen from her orgasm that it made everything feel more sensitive and tighter.

She hooked her legs over his calves as he began to slowly move inside of her, He claimed her lips with his own as she opened her mouth to him, their tongues dueling passionately as they began to move together. She cried out into his mouth at the feeling of his pelvic bone rubbing against her swollen clit. Her fingers trailed over his back, butt, and legs before wrapping around his waist and clinging to him, matching his thrusts. He took a turgid nipple into his mouth and suckled on it as she whimpered and groaned. In the back of her mind, Kate found herself wondering if Castle was trying to set a record on how many times he could make her come in one night. But the other part of her brain didn't care, because she loved the way he could make her body react. She could feel another orgasm building as she clung to him tighter, moving her legs up higher to change the depth of his penetration, causing her to gasp out loud as she felt him sliding in her deep. "Kate," he growled her name as he thrust into her deeply. He felt her tighten around him as she cried out his name. In another few thrusts, he emptied himself inside of her, before collapsing on her shoulder in exhaustion.

"I owe you . . . so big time," she sighed as Castle rolled onto his side and pulled her into his embrace.

"No, you don't," he protested. "Kate, it's not a contest. I like . . . no, I _love _making love to you. I love taking care of you. I love that I can turn you into a screaming, clawing maniac."

"You're lucky that I don't keep my nails long."

"I know," he placed a kiss to her temple. "And while I know that you like things a little, shall we say, rougher, don't you agree that slow can be nice?" 

"Slow can be very nice," she yawned sleepily as she cuddled into him. "But, I still say that I owe you."

He pulled the covers over them before settling against her. He couldn't wait until everybody knew about them so that this horrible weight could be lifted from his shoulders. As much as he loved keeping Kate to himself, there were times when he wanted to shout it out to the world that she was his girlfriend. His lips curled into a smile at the thought. _His _girlfriend.

**A/N #5: Two more chapters and this will be done. I have an idea for smut for the next chapter that I've never done before. Not the act itself, just the setting for said act. Please read and review. **

**A/N #6: Re-watched 'Rise' on my DVR and started thinking about something. Shouldn't Kate have three scars? The scar from the bullet itself, the scar from Josh inserting the chest tube and sewing her pulmonary vein; and a third scar which should be from when her heart stopped and Dr. Kovacs was forced to open her up. He wouldn't have used the incision that Josh used for the chest tube. **


	3. Chapter 3--Growing as a Couple

**Disclaimers: I just own the story ideas, not the characters. AWM is responsible for those guys.**

**Summary: Rick takes Kate to the Hamptons for the first time where they further explore their new relationship. A filler for 'Murder, He Wrote.' This is going to be a fairly short M-rated chapter because M is just how I usually roll.**

**A/N #1: The funniest scene in 'Murder, He Wrote' was when Ryan learned that Castle and Kate were together. The look on his face was priceless.**

**A/N #2: Watched 'For Lovers Only' on YouTube. I need to re-watch to decide if I liked it or not. I thought that it was beautifully photographed, but why did it feel like I was watching Beckett cheat on Castle?**

Chapter 3: Growing as a Couple

"_Are you saying that Richard Castle brought a woman into the interrogation with him?"_

"_Yes."_

"_What was her name?"_

"_I don't remember."_

"_Describe her."_

"_Tall, medium length brown hair, killer body. Kate! Her name was Kate!"_

"_Son of a—"_

Kevin Ryan still couldn't believe it. He and Javier Esposito had been trying for two days to find out who Kate had been going away with for the weekend. They'd even gone so far as checking out her previous boyfriends. And now he found out that she was in the Hamptons with Castle. He knew that he really shouldn't be surprised, but he was. When had the boss hooked up with the writer? He had to admit that the tension had been pretty thick between them for a while, but he couldn't believe that they'd finally actually acted on that tension.

"Bro, I've got feelers out to everybody I know as to who Beckett's seeing. Nobody knows anything. How is that even possible?" Espo was complaining.

"You know, I was thinking," Ryan sat at his desk. "I don't think it's any of our business who she's seeing."

"Bro, what've you been smoking? We've been trying to figure this out for two days."

"I know, but if she wants us to know, she'll tell us, right?"

"Yeah, I guess."

***CCC***

Once it was all said and done, Castle decided that it had to have been one of the strangest weekends ever. The whole idea had been to bring Kate here for the first time, but it seemed almost from the moment they'd entered the house, nothing had gone right. The icing on the cake had been the dead guy falling into his swimming pool just as Kate had dropped her robe.

They had one more day to spend together before they had to head for the city the next evening. After they made love that night, they lay in each other's arms while Kate planted soft kisses along his jaw line. "So, except for the dead guy falling into my pool, did you have a good time this weekend?" He asked her.

"Well, I wasn't crazy about spending time in a holding cell, but other than that, and the dead guy, yeah, this was nice," she continued kissing him. "It's truly beautiful out here, Rick."

"I'm glad that I was able to share it with you. I have a surprise for our last day here," he told her.

"Really? What?" She grinned at him.

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise," he kissed her before wrapping his arms around her and rolling them until he was hovering above her.

She loved the way that his eyes always lit up now when they were together. She wanted him to always look at her like that.

It was the crashing of waves in the distance that woke her early the next morning. She noticed that the doors leading to Rick's balcony were open and his side of the bed was empty. She got up and retrieved her short black gown from the floor where it had been discarded the night before. Pulling it over her head, she padded outside where she found Castle leaning against the railing, staring off into the distance. "Wow, the sunrise is beautiful," she whispered in wonder, walking up and wrapping her arms around his waist from behind.

"This is always my favorite time of the day out here," he continued staring out. "When I'm in the city, I hate waking up early. But out here, it's like I don't want to miss anything."

"I can understand why," she leaned into him, kissing his bare back. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Talk about what?" He turned and clasped his hands around her, pulling her into him.

"Castle, it's me. Running and hiding is _my _specialty, not yours. I thought that we were going to stop dancing around each other."

"I was just thinking about what you asked me the first day we came out here," the breeze was whipping through both of their hair.

"Castle, I didn't mean to—"

"No, it's okay. Sometimes I really don't like that guy that I used to be. Deep down I always wanted to be the guy who would settle down, get married and have a dozen kids. I guess it's because I never had that."

"We always want the things that we never had when we were kids. I don't resent the fact that you brought other women here. It was a stupid comment. I think that I was just overwhelmed by all of this. What you did before me isn't any of my business, just like what I did before you isn't any of your business."

"But it's okay to be hurt by some of it?"

"I guess. This is kind of a deep conversation for so early in the morning. Tell me about my surprise," she grinned at him.

"Katherine Beckett, if I told you about it, it wouldn't be a surprise," he pretended to scold her as she laughed and pressed closer to him.

***CCC***

"Castle and Beckett? Are you sure?" Jenny Ryan asked her husband over breakfast.

"How many women named Kate does he know?" Ryan looked at her over his coffee cup.

"Are you going to ask her about it? Or Castle, for that matter?"

"Jen, I can't. The New York Police Department has a carved in stone policy about co-workers dating. If Gates were to find out—"

"But, Castle isn't a cop," Jenny pointed out.

"Yeah, but he might as well be. Since he's been working with us, our case closure rate has gone way up, as crazy as it sounds. Some of his theories are beyond crazy, but when he's right, it's scary crazy how accurate he is."

"It's his writer's imagination. They're always looking for the crazy angles. Kevin, what'll happen if Gates does find out?"

"She'll kick Castle to the curb, which she's been dying to do from the very beginning."

"So, that just means you and I have to keep our mouths shut."

"Yeah, I guess it does," he gave her a rueful smile.

***CCC***

Kate was sitting in one of the chairs on Castle's front lawn, admiring the view when she sensed she was being watched. She turned to find Castle standing there with a huge basket over his arm. "I'd like to take you on a picnic," his grin was infectious. "Come on, take a walk with me."

She got up and walked over before taking his hand firmly in hers. He led her away from his property and down the beach before taking another path that wound around. "Where are we going?" She asked as she followed him up the sandy path.

"To my favorite place in the whole world. I come here when I need to be alone or when I need to think. I want to share it with you," he continued grinning at her.

He stopped so suddenly that Kate almost stumbled. She looked around her in wonder. They were on a grassy bluff that overlooked the ocean below. If she hadn't followed him, she never would've known this place existed. "Castle, this is . . . wow," she breathed as she turned to look at him.

"I spent a lot of time up here that summer when you got shot. I made a vow that I'd bring you up here someday, and here we are," he put the basket on the ground before removing the blanket from it and spreading it on the ground.

It was a wonderful fall day, perfect for a picnic. Kate smiled as Rick motioned for her to take a seat on the blanket. "So, when did you discover this place?" She asked, accepting a glass of wine from him.

"Right after I bought the house. I was still married to Gina at the time. I came up here for the first time after we split up. I was out walking and I took a different route. I ended up here and it was so peaceful. I must've stayed up here for two hours just thinking."

"Nobody else knows about this place? Not your mother or Alexis?"

"Nope. Just me and now you," he reached over and tucked her hair behind her ear.

He pulled several items from the basket and placed them on the blanket. He brought out a loaf of French bread, pate, cheese, and several different kinds of fruits. They shared the food and wine, enjoying the sunshine and each other's company. They lay side by side on the blanket, smiling and touching each other through their clothes. Kate reached into the basket and removed a strawberry, placing it between her teeth. "Want to share, Castle?"

He clamped his lips over hers and bit down on the berry, the juice running down Kate's chin as he laughed and set about licking it off of her. She began giggling as his lips blazed a trail down her chin and neck. "Ticklish much, detective?" He teased.

"Let's try this again without the mess," she popped another strawberry into her mouth and moved him up so that she could kiss him. She moaned as they shared the sweetness of the fresh strawberry. "That was much better."

He propped himself up so that he could look at her. She smiled up at him with that dazzling megawatt smile that he'd come to love so much in the past few months. The smile that she reserved just for him. He could stare at that smile all day long. He reached down and began slowly unbuttoning her shirt. "I've always wanted to do this," he gave her a wicked grin before he opened her shirt to his gaze, his smile getting wider when he discovered that she wasn't wearing a bra. "You're full of surprises, Det. Beckett," he kissed her, his teeth gently nibbling on her lower lip before he swiped his tongue over the bites to soothe them.

Kate wrapped her fingers in Castle's hair as the kiss deepened, his tongue reaching inside to swipe the inside of her mouth before tangling with her tongue. He loved the little sounds she made when they kissed. He felt her tug his shirt from the waistband of his jeans before she reached up and unbuttoned his shirt, pulling it from his shoulders. Seconds later those same dexterous fingers reached down to unbutton and unzip his jeans. "A little eager, detective?" He rose up to tease her.

"I'm always eager for _you_, Writer-Man," she teased back, running her fingers up and down his bare back. "But, from the feel of things, you're a might eager, as well."

"Well, that's because I'm always eager for _you_," he kissed her once again before moving down to kiss along her neck and collarbone.

Kate felt Goosebumps at the feel of Castle's lips and tongue caressing her bare flesh under her opened shirt. The breeze played over her skin everywhere his mouth touched, cooling her rapidly heating flesh. There was just something so wonderfully erotic about making love in the great outdoors. Knowing that Castle had brought her to a place so special to him just made it sexier. It showed her how very much he loved her. She hoped to someday be able to tell him that she loved him as much as he loved her.

She knew that while she wasn't ready to tell him, she could always just show him. She slipped her arms around Castle and expertly flipped him onto his back, a move that she'd first demonstrated to him the first time they'd ever slept together. He lay on his back smiling up at her, his eyes a deep sky blue. His smile turned into a groan when she reached into his boxers and gently squeezed him. She let go of him long enough to tug his jeans and shorts down his legs before once again taking him into her hand, running her hand up and down his hot, hard length, feeling him twitch and pulsate in her hand.

Still smiling, she once again released him long enough to stand up and remove her own clothes. "Kate, you always look hot, but right now you look . . . fucking hot."

Once all of her clothes had been removed, Kate once again planted herself on the blanket and kissed Castle, softly and sweetly before moving down to explore the rest of him. Kissing along his jaw and neckline, she moved down to nibble his collarbone, listening to his groans as she continued. She ran her hands lovingly along his chest, tweaking his nipples between her fingers much as he always did to her. He kept his eyes on her, loving to watch her face when she touched him. She smiled at him before moving down to kiss him once again, her tongue probing along his lips before he opened his mouth to allow her inside. As they kissed she once again found herself wondering just what it was about kissing this man that turned her into a puddle of goo?

He groaned in disappointment when she pulled away from him, but her huge smile assured him that he had nothing to worry about as she once again slithered down his body. Never losing her smile, she bent over him, pulled her hair to one side and took his hardness into her mouth, licking him from base to tip, which elicited an incredibly loud groan from Castle. "So, you like that?" She couldn't help asking as she released him from her mouth.

"Hell, yeah. I'd be insane if I said no!"

"Yes, you would," she once again took him into her mouth, caressing his balls with one hand as she moved up and down his length, humming around him as he fought to keep control. Sensing he was getting ready to come, she released him from her mouth and squeezed his head.

"Are you trying to kill me, woman?"

"Not today," she straddled his thighs before taking him into her hand and guiding him to her entrance before sinking slowly down on him. "Fuck, you feel good, Castle!" She began to move up and down on him.

Words escaped Castle's mouth at the moment. Instead he reached up and took Kate's breasts in his hands, caressing and pulling her nipples as her moans grew louder and louder. She let out a squeal when he suddenly sat up, pulling her tighter against him, his mouth hot and wet against her neck, his hardness seeming to hit every spot inside of her as they moved together. Their movements became frantic and choppy as they both headed toward their peak. Kate cried out against his neck as she came hard around him, her muscles clamping down and pulsing around him.

"Fuck, Kate," he cried out, shuddering against her shoulder as he emptied himself deep inside of her. "That was . . . you know what? I have no words," he drew her away from him so that they could share a long, tender kiss.

"You have no words? I find that impossible to believe," she rubbed her nose against his. "Thank you for bringing me up here. But, now you've got no place to come and be alone."

"I don't need to be alone anymore. I've got you," he brushed her hair from her shoulders.

As she kissed him, Kate could feel those three little words bubbling in her chest. Why, oh why, couldn't she just say them?

**A/N #3: One more chapter and this will wrap up. The final chapter is going to be slightly angst-ridden, so take note. **

**A/N #4: I want to thank all of my reviewers. While there haven't been many for this story, the ones that I have received have been quality. Thank you especially to the ones who pointed out that it is indeed possible that Kate only has the two scars from her shooting. I'm sorry, but I'm a nitpicker, and little things like that bother me. **

**Please follow me on twitter Caskett1960 or on tumblr as Caskett1960. I'm on Twitter several times a day, but am still trying to figure out Tumblr. You have to forgive me because I'm old. **


	4. Chapter 4--I Will Always Believe in You

**Disclaimers: I only wish that I owned 'Castle.' **

**Summary: Kate and Castle have a reaffirming moment after Jerry Tyson once again comes after Rick.**

**A/N #1: September 23 and September 25 have never seemed so far away. Season 6 premieres on ABC on the 23****rd**** and Season 5 reruns begin on TNT on the 25****th****. **

**A/N #2: This is a filler for 'Probable Cause.' Although it just shows Espo finding out about Rick and Kate, I assume that this was the episode where Kate told Lanie, due to the conversation that they have in the episode after Rick is arrested.**

Chapter 4: I Will Always Believe in You

"_Uh guys, when you check my phone records—" Kate started to tell the boys before Esposito looked at her and stopped her._

"_It's okay. We know," Javi told her._

"_We won't bring Gates into it unless we have to," Ryan promised her._

"_Thanks, guys."_

It was a nightmare. Kate went into the break room to make herself a cup of coffee, something that Rick did for her easily a dozen times a day. But at the moment, Rick couldn't do anything because he was locked up in a holding cell, being held on suspicion of murder. It was a nightmare, she thought to herself once again as she absentmindedly stirred the contents of her coffee cup. She didn't even hear the boys walking in until she heard someone clearing their throat. "You guys know that he didn't do this," she whispered, not wanting anyone outside of the three of them to hear their conversation.

"We know that the Castle that we know couldn't have done this, but we have to follow the evidence," Espo reminded her. "And right now, the evidence is—"

"I know."

"Beckett . . . Kate," she looked at Ryan, "maybe you should go to Gates' office and ask to be pulled from this. You're too close. We all know what's going to happen if you slip up and she finds out."

"I can't ask to be pulled, Kevin. He needs for me, for us, to get to the bottom of this."

"All that I'm saying is to be careful. Like I said, we can keep her out of this as long as we can, but if things really start pointing—"

"_He _didn't do this," she said in a harsh voice as tears filled her eyes.

She turned and fled the break room as the two detectives looked at each other. "Bro, we see it all of the time. The loved ones who don't want to believe. What if Castle did do it?" Espo looked at his partner.

"No way," Ryan shook his head.

"How can we be sure? After all, Montgomery betrayed us, didn't he?" Espo reminded him.

"No," Kevin continued shaking his head before turning and leaving the room.

Kate was in the ladies room trying to pull herself together. She'd already been to see Castle once shortly after he'd been booked. If she kept going to see him, she was going to lose it. Plus, it would only make her captain suspicious. She found herself wondering how the boys knew. She thought that they'd been so careful. There had been no PDA's at the station. She'd made sure of that, although at times it had been harder to keep Castle on a leash. The man who always had to touch things sometimes had a hard time understanding boundaries.

Her cell phone rang. She removed it from her pants and looked at the caller id. "Hey, Lanie," she sounded disheartened as she answered.

"Kate, are you okay?"

"No. Lanie, he didn't do this," she sobbed into the phone.

"Sweetie, I know that. Look, let's get out of here. We'll go to your place and talk."

"I need that, Lanie. I have something that I need to talk to you about, anyway."

They ended the call after agreeing to meet at Kate's apartment after work. She washed her face and returned to the bullpen, taking a seat at Ryan's desk as the Irishman glanced up at her from his computer. "Are you okay?"

"No," she shook her head. "Kevin, how long have you known?"

"I learned about it when you and Castle went away for that weekend a few weeks ago. I didn't say anything to Javi until this happened with Castle. I'd say that I'm happy for the two of you, but I don't think now's the right time to say that."

"No, now's definitely not the right time. Uh, I'm going to go see Castle one more time and then I'm going to clock out. Let me know if you find anything."

The scared man sitting in holding was not the same man Kate had made such tender love with the night before. Castle had the scared, bewildered eyes of a small boy as he sat on the other side of the mesh cage. "Kate, I don't understand any of this."

"We're going to figure it out, Castle. We all know that you didn't do this. Even Gates acknowledges that you're not capable of something so vicious."

"Are you okay?"

"No, but I'm not the one sitting in a holding cell about to be charged with murder. Don't worry about me. Hopefully in a day or two, we'll all be laughing about this at The Old Haunt."

"Kate, somehow I doubt I'm ever going to find anything funny about any of this."

"I'll come and see you in the morning before they transfer you."

"Can we bring me a cake with a nail file in it?" He looked at her hopefully.

"I'll see what I can do," she forced a smile before getting up and leaving.

***CCC***

When Lanie arrived at Kate's apartment, the detective fell into her best friend's arms and cried. The M.E. sensed that this was more than one friend concerned about another. After pouring them both glasses of wine, the two best friends settled down on Kate's living room furniture. "Why do I get the feeling that things between you and Castle have taken a turn?" Lanie looked at her friend.

"Because they have," Kate gave Lanie a sad smile. "We've been together since May."

"Since May? Girl, it's almost November. How long were you going to hold out before you said something?"

"Lanie, the situation's—"

"If you say 'complicated,' I'm going to get out of this chair and smack you. Sure, it's complicated because of Gates, but Gates is one person! Did you honestly think that one of your friends was going to spill about the two of you? So, are you happy with him?"

"I'm happier than I've been since I was 19 years old. That's why I know that he _didn't _do this!"

"We're going to figure it out. But right now, let's get your mind off of that man sitting in a small cell and give me details. Does he just have a vivid imagination or does he practice what he writes about?"

"Lanie!" 

"Come on, Kate! You know me. I want to know every scintillating detail."

"Let me just say that he definitely knows what he's doing," Kate admitted, blushing dark red as Lanie cackled. "Seriously Lanie, I've never been with a man who's so in tune with what I need, or what I want."

"Okay, start from the beginning and tell me how the two of you finally hooked up and did the deed. Don't you dare leave anything out!"

Kate told Lanie everything, from the night that she'd showed up at Castle's door in the rain to the present. For the next three hours, she did nothing but talk. She talked more in those three hours than she probably had in the previous three years. She talked and she cried. Lanie listened, refilled her wine glass, and handed her tissues when the need arose. It felt wonderful to have somebody else listen. When she was with Castle, he did the majority of the talking. When she was with Dr. Burke, she just discussed her issues and where she wanted her life to go. With her best friend, she was able to confess what it was that she was afraid of.

"I love him, Lanie. I love him so much, but I can't say the words. Why can't I tell him?" She sobbed as Lanie handed her yet another tissue from the rapidly dwindling supply.

"Because you're not ready. Believe me, when you're ready, you'll shout it from the rooftops," Lanie smiled.

It was after midnight when Lanie left to go home. Kate changed into her oversized football jersey and collapsed into bed, half drunk and all cried out. She pulled the pillow that Castle slept on when he stayed with her, inhaling the familiar scent of his cologne. After sobbing into his pillow for another few minutes, she fell into a restless sleep, punctuated by nightmares.

***CCC***

"_I'd give anything to go back to the first place you ever arrested me," Castle flashed Kate a small smile as she got him ready to be transferred to the tombs the next morning._

Escaped? How had Castle escaped? Was this one of Tyson's ploys to get rid of him once and for all? When Kate had visited him that morning and he'd told her about Tyson's visit the night before, at first she'd thought that maybe Castle had been hallucinating. She doubted that he'd had a second of sleep since learning that he was a suspect. But, thinking about it, this was the only thing that made any sense. She remembered asking him why 3XK had let him live after they'd saved him and Ryan in that hotel room that night.

"_As punishment. Make me pay for ruining his plan."_

Now here they sat on the Triborough Bridge watching as divers searched for Jerry Tyson's body. So far, they'd come up empty. "You should get that cut looked at," Castle looked at his partner, who had a nasty looking gash high on her cheekbone.

"I'm okay, Castle. I'm just glad that he didn't push my car into the East River," she made a small attempt at a joke. "I think the department would take my driving privileges away if I lost my car in another river."

"He's not dead," Castle looked toward the river.

"Castle, you shot him. I shot him. He fell 15 feet off of the bridge. He's dead."

"No," Castle shook his head. "He's the real life version of Jason Vorhees, Freddy Kruger, and Michael Myers combined. He isn't dead, Kate."

"Castle, I'm cold and I want to go home," she tried to re-focus his attention. "They'll call us when they find something. Come on, let's go."

She took his hand and tugged on it, forcing him to follow her. Since her car was going to need repairs, a patrol unit gave them a ride home to his loft. They stood outside after the unit drove off. After several minutes, Castle took her hand and headed for the curb, whistling for a cab. "We're going to your place," he said after he helped her into the cab. Once inside he pulled out his phone and called a number. "Mac, it's Richard Castle. I need for you to do a complete sweep of my apartment. Let me know if you find anything."

"Rick, the police did a sweep for bugs. Your loft was clean," Kate told him.

"I'm not taking you back there until I'm sure."

"Rick, what happened? What're you afraid of?"

"I'll explain everything in a few minutes," he motioned toward the cab driver as she fell silent. When the cab stopped in front of her building, he paid the driver and helped her from the car.

She unlocked her door and led him in before closing and locking it behind them. "I'll make some coffee."

"He was watching my every move, Kate. He told me that he saw me when I'd be on walks with Alexis. He said that he saw you and me making love."

"Castle, he was taunting you."

"I have to be sure. Nobody comes after my family and gets away with it. Let's find something to clean that cut on your face."

He led her into the bathroom where he found some peroxide and cotton balls. He knelt in front of her as she sat on the toilet seat. She winced while he dabbed at the cut on her face. She watched Rick's face while he tenderly attended to her. His whole expression was dark and serious. Kate didn't like dark and serious Castle. She was used to being the one who was dark and serious. His lightheartedness was the perfect balance to her more serious self. She stroked the side of his face before she leaned in and kissed him, her lips soft against his. After several minutes, he pulled her into his arms as they settled onto the floor by the bathtub. They just sat by the tub for a long time, drinking in each other. "Uh, the boys and Lanie now know about us," she looked up at him.

"How did they find out?"

"I had to warn Ryan and Espo when they checked your phone records. They were able to keep Gates out of the loop. I told Lanie, because I didn't want her to hear about it from Esposito."

"I have to admit that it's a weight off of us."

"Castle, let me take care of you. You're always taking such wonderful care of me," she smiled at him. "Let me return the favor."

He couldn't help but return her smile. He didn't think he'd ever had a woman want to take care of him. Meredith or Gina certainly never had. Neither had the long string of women he'd been with since his second divorce. Now here he was with this wonderful woman who actually _wanted _to take care of him. It blew him away how much he loved her. "God, I love you," he whispered into her hair. "So damn much."

She stood up and helped him to his feet before reaching over and turning on the taps in the bathtub. As it filled, she began undressing him. After she undressed him, she quickly removed her own clothes. Instead of letting him get into the tub first, she stopped him and got in, leaning against the back of the tub as Castle got in and settled against her. The logistics made things tricky, since his body was much broader than hers, but she didn't care. She wanted to take care of him for a change.

He settled against her shoulder, sighing at the feel of her fingertips trailing down his chest and stomach. She wrapped her leg over his, rubbing her foot along his calf. It was wonderful to be free from this nightmare, although he knew that it wouldn't truly be over until Tyson's body was pulled from the East River. But, it was nice to be believed. To have people know that he wasn't a horrible monster.

Kate picked up her bath sponge and filled it with soap before carefully soaping Rick's long, broad body. She smiled at the feel of him visibly relaxing against her. She knew how good it felt to be bathed by your lover, having been at the receiving end of many a warm bath at Rick's hands. She carefully soaped his arms and hands, her fingers tangling with his as she bathed him. She then moved to his legs and feet, smiling at the low moans emanating from Castle's chest. "Easy, Writer-Man," she whispered seductively in his ear. "We have all night."

He sighed at the feel of Kate's lips ghosting over his neck, before she gently bit his ear lobe, causing him to jump at the sudden sensation. Her fingers tripped over his chest, lightly trailing down his stomach, which he clenched in delicious anticipation of her next touch.

She reached down to knead his thighs, loving the way his muscles felt under her hands. She loved touching him. It had been that way since their first night together when she'd spent time familiarizing herself with his body. She loved finding all the ticklish spots and the spots where he really didn't like to be touched. To be truthful, she'd discovered that there weren't too many of the latter. Rick pretty much loved to be touched everywhere. "Pull the plug," she whispered in his ear. "The water's getting cold."

He obliged her request before climbing out of the tub and helping her out behind him. She grabbed a towel and began drying him, standing on her tiptoes to make sure that she was able to dry all of him. "I feel so much better," he kissed her softly.

"I'm glad, but I'm not done, yet," she brushed his lips with her fingertips, smiling as he lightly kissed them. "I want you to go and get in bed. I'll be there in a few minutes."

After he turned and left the room, she went to her one of the drawers in her bathroom vanity and took out a bottle of massage oil. Lanie had given it to her as a gag gift a while before and she'd never used it before now. She knew it was because she'd never been with anyone special enough to want to use the oil.

Rick looked up when Kate came into her bedroom with a large bath sheet draped over one arm and something concealed in her other hand. "What's in your hand?" He asked, his curiosity piqued.

"It's a surprise. Get up and let me spread this out," she instructed him as he got up and stood beside the bed, watching as she spread the bath sheet across the top sheet of her bed. "Okay, lie down on your stomach."

His curiosity still running wild, Castle did as she asked, pillowing his head on his arms and smiling when he felt Kate straddling the back of his thighs. "Kate, I'm so glad that you believed me."

"Shh. I know that you like to talk, Rick, but for the next little while, I just want you to feel."

She uncapped the bottle and poured a small amount into her hands, the smell of sandalwood instantly assailing both of their senses. She rubbed her hands together and started at his shoulders, rubbing the oil in and massaging him, almost instantly feeling him continue the relaxation that had started in the bath. She then moved her hands down to his back, her fingers kneading and soothing as they worked his muscles.

Castle had had many massages, but he couldn't remember any that came anywhere near as intimate as the one that he was experiencing right now. He decided that if Kate ever wanted to give up being a cop, she'd make a great masseuse. He groaned when he felt her climb off of his legs, but then he felt her wonderful hands caressing his legs and feet. He longed to flip over and touch her, but he knew it would upset her. After all, she'd told him that she wanted to take care of him and right now she was doing a fantastic job.

"Roll over," she instructed him, her voice sounding tight and breathless.

When he rolled onto his back, he could see tears on her cheeks. "Kate—"

"No," she once again put her fingers to his lips. "I'm okay."

That was when he realized that as terrified as he had been, Kate had to have been equally as scared. Especially standing on that bridge at Tyson's mercy, convinced that she was seconds away from death. She gave him a smile before pouring more oil in her hands and massaging his chest, the scent of the oil heavy in the air.

Kate loved his chest. He was so broad and so solid, but never more so than in his chest. He didn't have Josh's abs, but she liked his solidity better. Her favorite place to be was curled up against his chest, his arms wrapped around her. She gave him another smile before she leaned down and kissed him, so softly, so chastely, but to Castle, it was still sexy as hell. When he reached up to pull her closer, she moved away from him and continued her massage.

Kate took her time rubbing his abdominal muscles and his upper thighs, studiously avoiding his growing erection. "I thought that you were going to take care of me, not torture me."

"And I thought that I asked you not to talk."

Giving him one last sly smile, she laid her head down on his stomach and delicately glossed her fingers over him, feeling him grow against her. He reached his hand down and threaded his fingers through her hair, scraping his fingers along her scalp as he felt her lightly touching him. Finally he felt her hand wrap around him and slowly move up and down his hardening length. "Fuck, Kate," he growled at her touch.

Soon, but not soon enough, those fingers were replaced by a warm, wet mouth. He arched his back off of the bed at the feeling of her taking him in deeply, her tongue licking him all over. She hummed around him as she moved up and down. She continued to suck, listening to the sounds that he was making as she worked him with her mouth. Reaching down to caress his balls with her hand, gently rolling them, she heard him call out her name as he came hard into the warmth of her mouth. She didn't release him from her mouth until he went soft.

Rick felt her get off of the bed but he was too dazed to react until he once again felt the bed dip and he felt warm lips over his. "I should've warned you," he apologized as he kissed her.

"That's okay. If I hadn't wanted you to come in my mouth, I would've said something," she smiled, brushing her hand over his sweat soaked skin.

"So, are you going to tell me?" He brushed his thumb lightly over her cheek, avoiding the fresh cut on her face.

"Tell you what?"

"Why you were crying earlier."

"It doesn't matter now."

"It'll always matter to me, Kate," he looked at her solemnly.

"It was so hard seeing you in that holding cell. You looked so scared, Rick. I knew that you didn't do it, but I didn't understand what was going on. And then on that bridge, when he had me and he was going to make you watch him . . . kill me. I don't think I've ever been more afraid."

"We're safe now. You're safe now. I'm just glad that you believed me."

"I'll always believe you," she kissed him gently before he reached up and pulled her against his chest, to the one place where she always felt safe when she was with him. Listening to his strong heartbeat in her ear, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, for once without nightmares waking her in the night.

The End

**A/N #3: To the reviewer who referred to my Caskett sex scenes as a lovefest, thank you. I hate the term smut. It just sounds so . . . dirty. It took me years to learn how to write good romance scenes and it makes me feel good to know that some people think that I've gotten it down to an art form.**

**A/N #4: I have to give my beta/boyfriend Chuck a special shout out. He's so good about checking for errors and things that just don't make sense. And no, he's NOT my muse. **

**A/N #5: I had to include the dig about Montgomery because I still get upset when I see 'Knockout' and learn of a beloved character's betrayal. I like Penny Johnson Jerald's Capt. Gates, but I loved Roy Montgomery. **

**A/N #6: My next story will be a continuation of 'Mind Games' after the arrival of baby Ariel. **


	5. Chapter 5--Nightmares

**Disclaimers: If I owned 'Castle,' there'd be no cases. Hell, they'd probably never leave the bedroom. This is a variation of something that I posted on Twitter.**

**Summary: Post 'Recoil' and 'Still.' Castle learns about Kate's PTSD and Capt. Gates learns about Castle and Beckett.**

**A/N #1: I got a couple of requests asking for one more chapter. I realized that I forgot to write about Capt. Gates finding out about Caskett. Which was stupid considering that 'Still' is my second favorite episode ever. **

**A/N #2: I wasn't a fan of 'Recoil,' but I was trying to figure just when Kate might finally reveal her PTSD to Castle. If I mentioned a point, I apologize. I wondered just how repulsed Kate must've felt having to protect the man who was responsible for her mother's murder. **

Chapter 5: Nightmares

"_I wouldn't have done it, you know?" Castle turned toward the sworn enemy of both him and his girlfriend. "What she did. I would've stayed and watched."_

Kate had been having nightmares for weeks. There were nights when the whole apartment had been awakened by her screams. She was falling down that rabbit hole again and Castle felt powerless to stop her rapid descent. She was jumpy and easily frightened, like she'd been during the Lee Travis case almost a year before.

Castle knew that it was PTSD. Esposito had told him as much. But he needed for Kate to come to him herself and tell him. Espo had already warned him not to pry. The harder he pushed, the harder Kate would push back. Away from him, away from _them. _

Now, here they were sitting in the middle of her bed in the middle of the night after yet another nightmare. "Kate, you need to talk to me about what's scaring you so badly."

"You won't understand, Castle," she wiped at her eyes. She was so tired. She couldn't remember the last time she'd gotten a decent night's sleep. She just wanted to lie down and sleep for 24 hours without her fears creeping in.

"Try me," he reached for her hand, gently rubbing her fingers in his. "Let me tell you what I've noticed, okay?" She looked at him and nodded. "When you learned that you were going to have to protect Bracken instead of revealing him as the scum that he is, it got into your head. That's when I noticed you teetering over that rabbit hole again."

"I hate him, Castle," she said through gritted teeth. "I hate it that you, me, Ryan and Espo know what he is but we can't say anything without breaking our vow to protect Roy Montgomery. There were times when I was protecting him that I almost went and talked to Capt. Gates. Where I almost broke my word and told her just what he is."

"Kate, he's going to mess up," he reminded her of what they'd already talked about. "Dirty politicians always do. And, when he does, we're going to be there to testify as to what he is. Talk to me about the nightmares. Talk to me about the times when I talk to you, but I know that you're not really there with me. Let me help you."

"I don't know if you can help me, Castle. I don't think anybody can."

"Let me try," he forced her to look at him. "We have to stop this dance sometime, don't we?"

"I thought that I was okay after I got shot. And maybe I really was for a little while. But then Lee Travis started shooting people. Castle, I know that you were the one who asked Javi to talk to me. He told me that it was okay for me to be fucked up—"

"Kate, you're not—"

"Let me finish. He told me that was okay. That it didn't make me weak. That I needed to take it and make a strength out of it. So, that's what I tried to do. And for the most part, I've succeeded. Dr. Burke told me that there will always be things that will trigger these episodes. These PTSD episodes," she looked at him. "You're the first person that I've actually said the words out loud to. When I see Bracken, I see those pictures of my mother. He left her lying in that alley like garbage and I _hate _him for it! When I ran after him that night, I found myself hoping that I was too late. That he died in the explosion."

"Do you feel guilty for saving him?"

"No. I had a job to do. I just wish that I hadn't had that job to do at the time. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah. So, the nightmares have been about being forced to save him?"

"No," she shook her head. "I hear my mother calling for me while she's in that alley. She keeps saying the same thing. 'Katie Bug, I have something to show you.' And when I get to her, Bracken's standing over her with that smirk on his face. That's when I wake up screaming."

"How do you make the nightmares go away?"

"I don't. It's part of who I am, Castle. Like the scars and my four-inch heels. Are you sorry that you opened your door that night?"

"No," he smiled as he reached for her and pulled her into his arms. "I signed up for the whole package, so I'll take you, nightmares, PTSD, and all."

"It doesn't scare you, because it can get pretty bad sometimes."

"Are you kidding? I was married to a Deep-Fried Twinkie and survived it," he smiled at her as she leaned her forehead against his. "I love you."

He pulled her down into the warmth and safety of his arms, holding her close to his chest as they both drifted off to sleep.

***CCC***

"So, why are you here?" Dr. Burke asked his patient.

What was she supposed to say? 'Because Castle made me' made her sound like a child who couldn't make her own decisions. "I told Castle about my PTSD," she finally said as she sat in her usual chair.

"That's good," the psychiatrist told her. "How did he take it?"

"I think that he's suspected for a while. He just wanted me to say it out loud. I've been having a lot of nightmares about my mother recently. He wants to know how he can help."

"What has he been doing and I'll tell you if he's on the right track?"

"He talks me through them. Sometimes we have sex . . . afterwards."

"A physical release can sometimes help," he told her. "Has any of it helped?"

"Sometimes. He understands the nightmares, but I think he's having more trouble dealing with my flashbacks."

"Do you think it would help if I talked to him?"

"No," she quickly shook her head.

"Kate, we're not going to discuss you. You know that I can't do that. I can give him the tools to help you with the nightmares and the flashbacks. How often are you having them?"

"Lately, I've been having nightmares every night. The flashbacks are harder to pinpoint. Some days I have several and other days I don't have any."

"What's happened recently to trigger these episodes?"

"It has to do with that case that I told you about where I found the evidence. I'm sorry, but I can't give you more than that, not without revealing names which is something that I can't do."

"This case has to do with someone well known?" She just glared at him. "I'm sorry, I'll drop the question. You need to try to refocus your energy. Just like you did after you were shot."

"Okay."

Kate knew that Castle was going to be at the loft writing, so she went straight from Dr. Burke's office over there. She entered the apartment with the key that he'd given her and walked to his office where he was busily typing away on his keyboard. He looked up and smiled at the sight of her. "Hey," he smiled, getting up and walking over to her, pulling her into his arms, feeling her snuggle into his warmth. "You're freezing. Come on; let me get you some cocoa."

"Castle, is it too cold to go to the Hamptons?" She sat on a stool and watched him make her some hot cocoa. The real McCoy, not that packaged stuff.

"Well, it can be cold, but the nice thing about going in the winter months is it's deserted. Why?"

"Because I want to walk on the beach with you. I want you to take me on another picnic," she smiled, remembering him taking her to his favorite spot a few months earlier.

"It's a little cold to make love outside, Beckett," he made a face before placing a mug of hot cocoa in front of her, complete with the mini marshmallows he knew she loved.

"That's what the fireplace is for," she smiled as she sipped her drink.

He grinned back over his own mug of cocoa. He loved the fact that she was such a closet romantic. "Are you off this weekend?"

"Karpowski's team is on call," she confirmed.

"Okay. We'll leave Friday night and come back Sunday evening."

He knew that she'd been to see Burke. And as usually happened after her visits to her therapist, she just wanted quiet. So, after dinner he settled in one corner of the huge living room sofa with his laptop and Nikki Heat while Kate curled up at the other end reading. He couldn't believe that she was reading Stephen King. Normally she leaned more toward Patterson or Connelly. But tonight it was King. He heard a thump and looked up to see that she'd fallen asleep, her book falling to the floor. He continued to write for another hour before saving his document and closing his laptop. After putting it away, he came back into the living room to get Kate. He placed her book on the coffee table before carefully lifting her into his arms and walking toward their bedroom. "Have you ever met him?" She asked sleepily against his neck as he put her on the bed, removing her shoes and socks before putting her under the covers.

"Who?" He asked in confusion.

"Stephen King. Have you ever met him?"

"Once, a very long time ago. Why?"

"Because it must be really scary living in his head," she said as he burst out laughing.

"Worse than mine?" He stripped down to his boxers and got in bed beside her.

"Castle, you don't write about possessed cars or domes coming down and enclosing small towns. Your mind is Disneyland compared to his."

"No, I just try to come up with bizarre ways for people to kill one another. I think we both had demented childhoods," he kissed her as she curled up against him, her leg braided in his, her way of telling him that she was going to sleep now.

***CCC***

Kate was finishing up paperwork Friday afternoon when Capt. Gates came out of her office. "Where's Mr. Castle?" The captain asked.

"I'm . . . I'm not sure," Kate stammered. "I think he said he was doing something with his daughter and one of her friends this evening."

"Um-hmmm," she sat down in Castle's chair as Kate looked at her. "What about you?"

"What about me?" Kate felt panic setting in. Did she know about her and Castle?

"What are your plans for this weekend?"

"I'm going to catch up on my sleep. Dr. Parish and I will probably go out to dinner Sunday."

"Well, take care," Capt. Gates got up and walked back to her office, closing the door behind her. 'How stupid do they think I am?' She asked herself.

"Castle, I'm telling you that she knows," Kate told him when they were on the road to the Hamptons house just over an hour later. '"So, what're you plans?' You do know what she was really asking, don't you?"

"No, what?"

"She was asking if we were sleeping together."

"Kate, she doesn't know. We've been super careful at work."

"Except for the footage that stupid documentary crew shot," she reminded him.

"Which we got them to delete," he reminded her back.

"I'm telling you that she knows."

"Then, as careful as we're already being, we'll amp it by 1000. Okay?"

Castle hated it when she got paranoid. He sometimes wondered if the paranoia was a manifestation of the PTSD. "I'm sorry," she finally said. "I don't want to spend this weekend fighting."

The minute they entered Castle's Hamptons house, Kate could feel herself relaxing. That night, he made a huge nest of pillows and blankets, and started a fire in the fireplace. They then settled in their nest and watched the flames, in between exchanging soft, slow kisses, and gentle touches.

Kate had her head resting on Castle's shoulder while he rested his hand on her bare stomach under her shirt. She placed her hand on top of his under the shirt and laced her fingers with his. Twining her fingers with his like this always reminded her of that first time. She rolled over so that she was half reclining on top of him. He gave her a wide bright smile when she brought her lips down and kissed him. He was then more than a little surprised when she sat up and lifted her shirt over her head, tossing it to one side before she reached down and unclasped her bra, throwing it in the same general direction as her shirt. "What's wrong, Castle? Cat got your tongue?"

He grinned. He liked it when playful Beckett came out to play. He hadn't seen this side of her since before the whole mess with Bracken had popped up. He sat up and reached for her, tugging her close as his mouth came down on one of her breasts, his lips sucking and his teeth gently biting as Kate pulled his head closer. She cupped his head and pulled him back upward, her lips hungry on his, their tongues tangling together.

Castle rested his hands on her hips, grazing the top of the yoga pants she was wearing. He placed her on the nest of blankets before hooking his fingers into the sides of the pants and sliding them down her legs, along with the thong that she was wearing. "Clothes off, Castle," her voice was hoarse with desire.

He smiled, quickly complying with her request. "Better?" He moved down so that he was resting with his hands on either side of her. He brushed his lips over hers as she tried to deepen the kiss, only to have him smile as he began his descent down her body. She whimpered when she felt his lips once again close over her left breast, while his hand caressed her right breast. She carded her fingers through his hair, holding him closer while he continued to tantalize her.

Castle loved the taste of her, the texture of her skin under his mouth, the smell of her skin. He traveled down to the long scar on her side, brushing his lips and tongue down the length of it as he heard her whimper. Her abdominal muscles quivered under him at the feeling of his light kisses around her navel. "Castle, please?" Her voice was breathless and needy.

"What do you want, Beckett?" She loved it when he called her by her last name during sex. It always sounded so fucking sexy.

"You, Castle. I just want you," she used the same words she'd used that night at his front door.

He could see how wet she was as he moved between her thighs. "How badly do you want me?" He nipped gently as the inside of her thigh, hearing her whimper at the sensation.

How badly? Was he kidding right now? But okay, if he wanted to hear her say it, she could play it that way. "Castle, please," she growled, attempting to pull him tighter against her. When he finally made contact with her with his hot, wet mouth, she almost came instantly at the sensation.

The feeling of his mouth on her was relentless. His fingers, lips and tongue seemed to be everywhere at once. Kate could feel herself free-falling into an explosive orgasm. She clawed at the nest of blankets and writhed under him as the tension began building up. She could feel it starting in her toes and working its way up. When it crashed over her, she screamed herself hoarse, not even recognizing the screams coming from her throat as hers.

"Castle, stop," she began pleading with him. "Too, too sensitive. Oh my god," she felt strong aftershocks rocking her body as she felt Castle gentling her down from what had to have been the strongest orgasm of her entire life. She felt him moving his way back up her body, trailing light kisses along the way. She wrapped her arms around him, kissing him hungrily as she felt his rock hard erection nudging against her.

"Are you okay or do you need a few minutes?"

"Short recovery time, Castle, or have you forgotten?" She was still finding it hard to breathe as she felt him guide himself into her soaking wet, swollen core and enter her slowly.

He stared into her eyes, now a smoldering brown with passion as he began to move inside of her. "Fuck, you feel so good," he bent down and sought out her pulse point, sucking on it gently as she whimpered.

Feeling the flames begin to flare up once again, Kate began moving her hips to meet his thrusts, which were gradually getting faster and faster. Castle began moving his hands up and down her body, stroking every inch of available skin along the way. Finally his hands found her breasts and he tweaked her nipples as she cried out and arched against him. "Fuck, Castle! I'm so close!" She wrapped her hand around his head and pulled him down to her mouth.

He felt like she was going to swallow him whole as she kissed him hungrily, her tongue stroking the inside of his mouth. Suddenly she pulled away from him and threw her head back in a silent scream as her muscles fluttered around him. He thrust three more times before he came with a loud cry of release, collapsing onto her shoulder.

"I can't move, Castle," she complained.

He rose up and smiled at her before kissing her softly and tenderly. "How about a shower?"

"Get clean while we're getting dirty?" She couldn't help grinning at him. "I'd love to."

***CCC***

'_You are beauty, passion, and fierce intellect. Be my Valentine. Rick' (Reality Star Struck)_

'_Oh, for Heaven's sake, detective, kiss the man. Since we're on neutral ground, between you and me, I think that he deserves it.'_

'_Yes, sir. So do I.'_

Gates has suspected that Det. Beckett and Mr. Castle had been pulling the wool over her eyes for some time. But Castle's fierce devotion to Beckett as she stood on a bomb poised to go off at any time had only proven what she'd suspected. Capt. Victoria Gates had been a cop for a long time. As she'd told Det. Beckett, she'd come from a long line of cops. She knew all about rules and regulations. But she also knew that Beckett wouldn't be the first New York City police officer or the last for that matter to have a relationship with her partner. And technically, Richard Castle wasn't a cop. Like she told them after Beckett had come off of the bomb, as long as they could behave themselves at the station, she could continue to deny that anything was going on.

Gates was doing paperwork a few days after the bomb scare when she heard a light knock on her door. "Enter!"

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm back on duty, sir," Kate stuck her head in the captain's door.

"So, did you take time to decompress as I asked you to?"

"Yes, sir. I even made a point of speaking to my therapist."

"Good. I'm glad to hear it. Well, I'm sure that you've got work to do."

"Yes, sir."

Kate closed the door and breathed a huge sigh of relief. So far, things seemed to be the same with the captain as they'd been before she'd almost been blown to bits. Castle would be glad to know that she still wasn't a fan. She grinned as she walked to her desk. She couldn't wait to give him the news as soon as he came out of hiding.

Gates watched Det. Beckett going to her desk and grinned herself, knowing that she could still continue to give Mr. Castle a hard time.

Castle walked to his desk beside Kate's feeling so much better now that everybody knew about them. It had been a rough eight months of hiding. It felt wonderful being able to breathe and be themselves.

**A/N #3: I had a rough time writing this chapter. I don't feel it's one of my better ones and it was difficult to find a good ending spot. Please read and review.**

**I can be found on Twitter Caskett1960 or on Tumblr Caskett1960.**


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